What is an Inner Critic? Learn to Recognize Yours
While everyone’s critic is different, there are some commonalities you can observe to give you the heads up that you may be telling yourself some things that aren’t true. Be aware of these patterns in order to recognize what is an inner critic.
About Your Inner Critic
” When we tell ourselves something long enough, we’re likely to live that message”
Your inner critic is the dialogue that plays in your head, sending you negative messages that can sabotage your success. Our thoughts and feelings are deeply connected. When you send yourself negative messages, it leads to emotions such as insecurity and sadness. These feelings often send an unintended message to the world, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. When we tell ourselves something long enough, we’re likely to live that message. Fortunately, the same can be true for positive messages.
· What is an Inner Critic Voice
Being critical of ourselves is a common human trait. It’s just easier to see the negative in ourselves over our own shining strengths. Fortunately, with some education and introspection, you can learn to recognize your own self-defeating thoughts. This insight is the key to managing and overcoming them. Try to pay closer attention to your inner ramblings. Remind yourself that just because you think it doesn’t make it true. Write down patterns you notice, as this will help you to better determine which ideas are most harmful to your well-being and which messages should be addressed.
· Ways to Tame It
Make a real attempt to stop playing events over and over in your mind when you’ve had a bad day or regret something that has happened. This only intensifies the unproductive cycle. Instead, try to find active solutions to the issues you’re facing. Consider what advice you’d give to a friend. Allow yourself the same kindness and generosity. Look for evidence to contradict the bad messages and then re-frame the negative things you’re telling yourself into more realistic messages. Finally, consider the worst-case scenario. In most situations, it’s really not all that bad after all. It’s certainly not the end of the world, and you can usually overcome such results. This should give you the confidence to push fear and doubt aside to move forward toward your goals.
Harsh Words
Your inner critic definitely isn’t nice. That’s obvious. However, this voice tends to go beyond just being unkind. It can be downright mean. When you notice yourself having thoughts that are particularly harsh, take note. It’s probably your inner critic. It’s okay to give yourself some constructive criticism and to strive to do better sometimes, but this type of critical message usually isn’t the productive and encouraging kind. It’s meant to bring you down and hold you back. Don’t listen to it.
Unfair Comparisons
“Your only competition is yourself. ”
Your inner critic is fantastic at comparing your abilities, possessions, and life to those of other people. These comparisons are never fair or just. Your inner critic will feast on that scrolling feed of perfect social media stories and fill your head full of ugly messages. All you will hear is that someone else is better than you or that you’ll never measure up. Again, these messages don’t do anything to serve you and should be ignored. Remember your only competition is yourself.
Repetitive Messages
One of the easiest ways to recognize your inner critic is that your critical inner voice tends to say the same thing again and again. When you find yourself ruminating on a less-than-desirable trait or agonizing over past events again and again, find a way to interrupt those thoughts. Tell yourself to stop. Take a break and try to look at things more realistically. Your inner critic repeats these harmful messages as a way of sabotaging you. The more you tell yourself these words, the more likely you are to believe them. This is definitely a case for reframing a negative message to a more realistic and positive one.
Not in Your Best Interests
You can also learn to recognize your inner critic because your inner critic is not speaking up for your best interests. It’s not a tool that works to help you do better. The word “critic” is in the name. You wouldn’t be critical of a friend if you wanted to encourage or lift them up, so please try to be gentler with yourself. Shutting up your inner critic is an act of self-love and empowerment. There are far better ways to push yourself to achieve.
Keep these things in mind when it comes to identifying the mean voice that lives inside your head. These tips for recognizing your inner critic will serve you well as you pursue a journey of becoming stronger and more in charge of your thoughts.
You can also watch Rick Hanson’s TEDxMarin Talk about hardwiring happiness
P.S. You may also be interested in our popular ebook, Hush Now – Quiet Your Inner Critic, and the accompanying Workbook available on Sale now in our Digital download section.